Can you be "too into dolls"?

I don't know. That's the current question in my household. When family members complain that they "can't even buy a Christmas gift for you,"and then accuse you of being "too into dolls," is there any truth in that? I'd like to looks at the facts.

1. Yes. It's very possible to be "too into" some hobbies. If you run out of space, time or money; if the dolls are really taking over your life to an extent that you don't do anything else (like bathe or sleep or socialize); if you neglect others in your family on a regular basis for your hobby; then yes. I suppose it is very well possible to be too into dolls or any hobby (or job, or television show, or sporting events, for that matter). But no, I don't fall into that category. In fact, all my dolls are currently on display. I still do most of the housekeeping and cooking for the family. And my children are not neglected. And if others are feeling neglected, well, it might be for reasons other than dolls; such as, lack of communication.
2. Is it difficult to buy gifts for people who have hobbies? Not at all. Usually, these people have wish lists, and regular stores from which they shop, and this is a simple way to buy gifts for them, which they will be sure to love. Now, I do understand that there are some people in this world who feel like they need to "better" other people, and assure that all members of their family are "well-rounded" and working up to their full "potential," a.k.a. being overly controlling. In that case, perhaps a gift involving a doll may not be their ideal gift idea for me. But I don't consider their controlling behavior (which I am sure is frustrating) to be my problem. I think it's annoying, but it isn't my problem to fix.
3. Is doll collecting, the way I do it, harmful to me or my family? I don't think so. I do need to especially watch my budget, but I think I'm doing well there, especially with my recent discovery of talking about it, sticking to my allowance, and also trading dolls. As far as edification, I've found that it actually increases my confidence in groups of people and making friends, as I'm not really very social, and doll meets and clubs are a fun and easy way to get involved with real people (not that you, dear reader, aren't a real person). I also have been learning a lot about photography, sewing, netiquette, writing and blogs. I think those are all great things to learn and great ways to foster my creativity. In that sense, I find doll collecting multi-faceted, interesting, a growth experience, and very fun.

So in short, no, you don't have to buy me dolls for Christmas. And no, I suppose you don't have to "approve" of my doll collection. But I'm an adult, and I can spend my time the way I like. It's an edifying outlet of my creativity, and I enjoy it. I can involve my daughters, and I can keep myself busy, thinking and creative. Plus, for me, it's a lot more fun than housekeeping. It's a great reward for it, in fact.

Opinions and assholes.

Lately, on some of the blogs I follow--and I read a lot of doll blogs online--I've noticed there has been yet even more issues about having opinions online.

The single post that caught my eye was this one. Keeping in mind that I tend to read blogs, not message boards, since message boards are usually full of shit like this, I am not at all familiar with the incident. You might be, and if you are, good for you.

But I don't plan to comment on the incident. I am planning to comment on dolls and having opinions about them, and writing a blog, and then commenting on message boards.

• If you have a doll blog, where you post reviews on dolls, you need to establish both your credibility and tone. How you decide to do this is 100% up to you, since it's your own damn blog and your own damn opinions.
• The fact is, controversial blogs have way more readers than non-controversial blogs. They just do.
• As a blogger, you want as much traffic as possible. If you offend readers, honestly, they don't have to read your blog.
• Once you decide on your tone, you have to stick to it. You can't really change that tone and style when you post to message boards. Why would you want to? You want more blog readers, and you want to maintain your credibility, right?
• And damnit, if they don't like your tone, they don't have to read your blog.
• Just like if you don't like a doll, don't fucking buy it.

There are many more opinions on the web than they are assholes. Though it's easier to act like an asshole online than it is in person. But a blogger isn't being an asshole if she says she doesn't like a particular doll or if she doesn't share your taste.

Why do people take this so damn personally? Just don't read the damn blog if it offends you. If a comment offends you, or appears to rain on your parade, just ignore it.

I, for one, appreciate honesty. Even in doll reviews. In fact, especially in doll reviews.

Used Doll Pet Peeves

I haven't been using this blog as much as I should. I think it would really help to post more frequently here. In fact, allow me to post a few of my least favorite secondary market pet peeves.

Let me start by saying how much I appreciate being able to buy dolls on the secondary market, and used dolls. I really like to be able to save a buck here and there. Plus, there are no doll stores in my area--the closest is about three hours from here, if there isn't any traffic. I do rely a lot on the web for doll sales, and those do come with an automatic buyer-beware listing. Still, there are some general rules I wish to which sellers would conform:

1. Non-smoking environments are non-smoking. It means, the owner of the doll doesn't smoke, the significant other doesn't smoke, and no one else in the household smokes. Not even just outside. If the doll is stored in a common area of a condo or apartment complex, where people might smoke, this is not a non-smoking environment. I'm sorry, but paper and cardboard absorbs cigarette smoke like crazy, and you can't get rid of it. So does polyester fabric. Do not sell your items as non-smoking if they aren't.
2. List your doll for sale in the correct condition. If your doll has never been removed from its box, say so. This is NRFB. If you've taken the doll out for pictures, your doll is unfortunately not a NRFB doll. It might be considered mint in the box (MIB), however. And list the actual condition of the doll in the listing (including whether your item is odorless, from a non-smoking home, etc.), so your buyer isn't disappointed.
3. Stains: Some buyers don't care about stains on a doll. For example, I have a friend who recently obtained a grail doll--Bewitched Sydney from the 2005 Tonner Halloween convention, I believe--and she had stains on her arms and legs from her black and purple outfit. Since my collector friend intended to keep her dressed in this original outfit, the stains were fine by her. So sellers, be honest about your doll's stains.
4. Pictures: Make a point to take good, clear, focused photos, in natural light or bright indoor light, of the actual doll you have for sale. Excuses such as, "My camera is broken," are very poor. Wait till your camera is fixed or borrow a friend's, and then sell your doll.
5. BJDs: Please list what condition the stringing of your doll is in when you sell your ball-jointed doll. Will she stand on her own, or is she loose or too kicky? Is there uneven yellowing on your doll? Resin yellows in most cases, but some will yellow unevenly. Are there dents or scratches in the doll?
6. Is your price firm or negotiable? If you're not listing on eBay, state if your price is negotiable or not. That will save us buyers some hassle.
7. Get back to your buyers in a timely manner. If you're going out of town, remove your for-sale listings temporarily, or issue an out-of-town notification on your email.
8. What are shipping costs? Include them in your listing. There isn't a reason not to include shipping. Weigh the package before you post the listing, so you're ready to answer any questions, or so the buyer can look up his or her own shipping cost before contacting you.
9. Where are you willing to ship? US only, or will you ship overseas? Which countries?
10. Finally, what types of payment will you accept? Do you accept layaway or trades? List that in your trades as well. If you require insurance, that would also be handy to know. Do you accept returns? What's your policy?

Listing doll-related for sale, and buying them online shouldn't be difficult. It should be easy and fun. One of the great things about doll collecting is that we can "upgrade"--trade up, down or across--if our tastes change as we collect. Why can't we collectors come up with a standard for listing pre-loved dolls for sale, to keep each other happy?